Great Expectations

Good Day,

Life is surprising and full of turns, things happen that you would never have expected. I guess that's why many of us refer to the "unexpected" as a curve ball. The question then becomes: Is it the curve ball itself that surprises us,or it is the disappointment from our expectations not being fulfilled?

One has to begin to question the values of expectations in life, are they good and if so, in what way? For me my expectations always seem to be tempered by previous experiences. If I expect a lot of guests at my party and only three show up, that conditions my expectations the next time I throw a party. seeing expectations in this way further enforces there minimal value in life because i can see they are nothing more than "conditioned wishes" I have built upon in my mind. The odds of any event actually meeting our own overblown expectations is rare indeed. This is not to say we should all be pessimists with low bars, but it does require balance like all things in life.

Walking into a situation without any expectation would likely be a better approach to take. Being without expectations or preconceived notions is as difficult as living a life without judgments or opinions. Yet by simply recognizing our "expectations" for what they are (wishes) we can begin to better balance them against reality. We naturally have expectations. We want to be in control of our lives. We want to be offered that perfect job. We want our family to support us. We want to be desirable to our partners. We want to be treated fairly. We want, we want, we want, and we want... but none of this wanting makes it a reality andmore often than not leaves us disappointed and feeling beaten.

We don't always get what we want, but we always get what is right for us. The curve balls thrown our way require us to duck or dodge, always altering our game plan. The rules change, our expectations are altered once again and we get to see things differently. Sometimes the alternate path offered is a difficult one. It's important to keep our eyes open, there are gems to be found along the challenging and bumpy pathways. My party with fewer guests allowed me to have more intimate conversations, and deepened my relationships with those individuals.

Life is good when you let it flow naturally. Expect to get sucked into the river of life without a paddle occasionally, and maybe even get tossed out of the canoe. It's just a matter of learning to swim and going with the flow.

Peace and Love, Jim